Merry Christmas???

As Christmas has arrived and is about to pass within a blink of an eye, I have spent my first Christmas feeling lost in a crowd of friends and family, wondering why I feel like this. I never thought that loving someone so much could actually hurt so bad at times! I didn't really want to celebrate Christmas this year, I actually asked my mom to not wrap any presents because I didn't want to be opening presents as my husband is off serving our country with nothing. I feel like I still have to put on a somewhat good face for my girls, give them as good of a Christmas as I can, even though they don't quite understand! I know that Christmas is not about presents, or what you eat, or who your with...it's our about our Saviors birth, and so many people forget the true meaning of Christmas, but it still hurts to not spend it with the one you love most and have a present or two from that person. I got a call from my hubby tonight, and it made my heart skip a beat, I miss that feeling, I miss holding his hand just walking in the mall, I miss bickering over something completely stupid, I miss hearing I love you, or getting a goodnight kiss!! There is so much that we take for granted when they are here, but when they are gone, it reminds us of what we would do just to have them back. Maybe missing a couple holidays will make homecoming that much sweeter than if it were just a 7 month deployment (I don't think it will be any different, but maybe)....maybe we will be able to make up for it next year! I hope that everyone has a very Merry Christmas and remembers what it is really about, and remembers to enjoy every second of that crazy family you have and the flaws that every family has...because I sure do miss having my other half!!

Feels like forever!

It seems like forever ago that I blogged, I have been so busy and not enough time in the day to do everything! Life has been so exhausting, I feel like I can't keep up with it! As December has started and we are already a week into it, the holidays are coming up fast, and I'm not ready to spend them alone. I haven't gotten to hear from my hubby in a while, and I haven't heard his voice in two weeks, maybe if I hear his voice it will make life seem a little better, maybe it will feel like we aren't so far away from each other and that life is not so lonely! I am in desperate need of strength to get through this long haul of a deployment. Everything I have left of me is exhausted and in need of something! I can't stop thinking about all the men and women (especially my hubby) who is spending this holiday season overseas and serving our country, who don't get to spend it with their families and don't get to watch their children open their Christmas gifts! I am hoping that everyone can keep our military in their thoughts and prayers at this time of year as I am sure it must be the hardest for everyone!